Men's Health Month

 I don't want to go into detail here on what I deal with exactly on a daily basis, that's too private, but through this sketch I did want to share my own condition in the spirit of Men's (Mental) Health Month. I take the meds in this painting on a regular basis for chronic depression, suicidal thoughts, anxiety, and insomnia, mainly. 

I've been in and out of therapy and dealing with these things since at least high school, but I've reached new lows during the past 3 years or so. I've been taking the meds and seeing a professional psychiatrist (instead of just a psychologist/counsellor like before) since 2019. It's a bit strange as the shrink says I might never be cured and have to take meds for the rest of my life, and I thought in the beginning "okay, now I'm officially crazy/mentally ill/unstable" but I've since gotten used to taking the meds every day in order to survive. As the shrink said I'm still not cured, they're not miracle drugs, I still have plenty of ups and downs but they definitely help to get through the average day and not succumb to my own overthinking. 

I've tried many different medications since 2019, far more than pictured here, but not all of them worked out of course. Especially for the insomnia I've tried almost everything already and I'm still tired every day, but together with the psychiatrist we continue trying to find new solutions. 

I'm the wrong person to turn to if you just want to hear stuff like "everything will get better", because I'm not even convinced they have for me yet
, and it depends on your own situation as well but I wanted to make this post just in the spirit of transparency, and maybe raising some awareness.